Destroy the Chest V.2/spin-off

[SpwnX]

The chest has an integrated computer and reads all of them instantly, aquiring immense knowledge.

Chest gains +1 resistance to bad words.

I throw the chest in a hole and leave it there.

 

[Someone Else 37]

The chest appreciates this added layer of defense.

I drill a hole under the chest, load it with a couple of nukes, and set them off.

 

[RealKC]

The chest is very fast and is able to put them in your shirt, bye.

I ask the chest if he could vote Trump.

 

[Celestialphoenix]

The chest runs for president and trumps Trump in the polls.

I place a blackboard by the chest and run my fingernails down it.

 

[Someone Else 37]

Everyone within earshot cringes and covers their ears, except the chest.

I take your chalkboard and a piece of chalk, explain the P vs. NP problem to the chest, and ask it to solve it.

 

[gold49]

The chest solves the problem, and now every hacker and government is begging the chest to show them how to solve the problem. Luckily for us the chest never shows its work.

I feed the chest several tons of sugar filled candy.

 

[Someone Else 37]

The chest gets a massive sugar rush. Now you've created an indestructible box that won't stay still.

I set up some cage traps in an attempt to capture the chest.

 

[RealKC]

The chest eats the cage traps.

I summon a wither hoping that it will kill the chest.

 

[Someone Else 37]

The wither fires at the chest, blasting it into the air.

I quickly set up a few spike traps loaded with menacing adamantine spikes where it looks like the chest will land.

 

[RealKC]

Someone gives the chest an angel ring.


I start learing Thaumaturgy so I can get crazy enough that when I look at people they die...
Also I pay someone to /try/ to assasinate the chest

 

[darthwesix]

you look at your assassin and he dies and chest eats you

I make a wither storm

 

[RealKC]

The wither storm attacks you.

I look atnthe interior of the chest.

 

[jdog1408]

The chest denies your meta play.

I teach the chest Metaphysics

 

[Someone Else 37]

The chest starts summoning the spirits of the ancestors of whoever the heck put it here.

I call the Ghostbusters.

 

[RealKC]

The chest eats the Ghostbusters.

I go to the chest and say: "I am YOUR father!"

 

[Someone Else 37]

The chest whips out a lightsaber and cuts your hand off.

I dump a bucket of saltwater on the chest, hoping to short out the lightsaber.

 

[RealKC]

The chest drinks the saltwater

I go to the chest and say: "May the force be with you!"

 

[Someone Else 37]

You inexplicably begin to suffocate.

I get a lightsaber, turn it on, and throw it at the chest.

 

[RealKC]

The lightsaber returns to you.

I shoot lightnings at the chest! MUAHAHA!

 

[keybounce]

The chest pulls out a lightning rod, grabs the lightning bolt and stores it in a buffer, and then complains, "Only 5K RF for an entire bolt of lightning?"

http://www.minecraftforum.net/forum...7237-dons-lightning-rod-mod-control-the-skies

I hire Jar-Jar, the hidden Sith Lord, to devise a plan for the chest without revealing his involvement.