Granted, he starts buffing everything, teams up with BlueDart, and takes over the world. The last thing you see before your mind implodes upon itself from the imbalance is in the changelog. "Made the wooden sword more useful, octupled damage and reduced durability usage. Can now be crafted with dirt to make diamonds" I wish I could impersonate other people without sounding like myself.
Granted, but it instantly turns into a cat, and then a mountain lion. Just as it's about to strike, it turns into pure flames, and gives you a heat scar for the rest of your life. You eventually get paranoid of cats and fire, and burn yourself alive in an incinerator, in an old mine, where you're never seen or heard of again.
Peggle's wish is granted. You can now spit out textures like it's nobody's business. The only problem is that these isntant textures are so bad, it makes people's eyes literally melt.
DavidCrap's wish is granted. You can wish here all you like, as long as you corrupt the previous Player's wish. (no free wishes?!)