A Forum Game To Pass The Time! (Corrupt A Wish)

[Lucius]

OVER 500 wishes granted and corrupted! 15th march 2013​

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There's a lot of people on here who post often so I thought I'd provide some forum based entertainment.
I saw this excellent and darkly humorous thread elsewhere, and felt the need to spread.

The premise is this, you can only post if you can fulfill the previous wish while corrupting it's purpose to make it unwanted/deadly.
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Example:
I wish I was immortal.
(next post) Wish granted! You are turned into a stone statue but keep your consciousness, unable to interact with the world around you or even hide in sweet slumber.
I wish I had a pizza.
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And let the insanity begin!

I wish RedPower 2 was released!

 

[gusgillis1]

Wish Granted! But the buggy release of RP2 has corupted your whole java, making it so you can never do anything related to java (Including minecraft)

I wish I had 10 trillion dollars.

 

[QueWhat]

Wish granted! You earn 10 trillion dollars in seconds but learn that it is all drug money and are being hunted down by every single law enforcement agency in the world. Even Chunk Norris and Steven Seagal are after you!

I wish I got another job or boss.

 

[INCSlayer]

wish granted! but the job is even worse and your boss is a mobster

i wish i had more friends

 

[RampantPanda65]

Wish granted! You get new friends but they live on Mars with no way to communicate with them.

I wish a chicken could lay cows. <-----

 

[Meldiron]

Your wish is granted. But giving birth to the cows make the chickens burst open simulare to alien births in alien movies and chickens are soon extinct. (Poor roosters!)

I wish i could fly without needing any epequipment at all.

 

[Lucius]

Wish granted, you are given the ability at fly and control your direction, at supersonic speeds no less, and to top it off, you need no equipment! In fact you must be naked to even initiate this rapid ascent and travel speed. At the mind boggling speed of mach 3 you realise the difficulty to breathe and maintain body temperature.... If only you had some brakes or any way to slow down, even water acts as a solid surface at these speeds.

I wish Direwolf20 would post videos on youtube more often about the forgecraft server.

 

[beringtom]

Wish granted! But then china takes over the world and bans the internet!

I wish Tintin was a redhead!

 

[Celestialphoenix]

Wish Granted- but 'shes' still a guy.

I wish for 6 fingers on 1 hand.

 

[QueWhat]

Wish Granted- but 'shes' still a guy.

I wish for 6 fingers on 1 hand.

Wish granted, you grow a 6th finger but it comes out mutated and annoying for it calls you names all the time to the point where you end up cutting the finger off.

I wish I was the smartest programmer in the world.

 

[Meldiron]

Wish granted! But after a week of living on the international space station Eloraam gets tired of her new home and moves back to earth.
Making you the second smartest programmer in the world.

I wish i could turn all my minecraft diamonds to real diamonds.

 

[Lucius]

Your wish is my command! Your minecraft diamonds can be outputted to a custom digital to reality printer via a specialist mod machine in minecraft. Unfortunately they are still 2 dimensional; as such are impossible to use in any form except to look at from above or below when they spew out of the printer and float away, unable to change height as that would be a 3rd dimension alteration. Any attempt to touch their side merely breaks the molecular bonds between atoms, hence they slice off your fingers and travel on to seperate walls, trees, people, cars. much like those anime shows with highly skilled ninjas that slice so clean the two halves seem one for moments afterwards.

I wish that procreation was money based so that people unable to feed themselves could never have children, thus ending 3rd world hungers.

 

[QueWhat]

I wish that procreation was money based so that people unable to feed themselves could never have children, thus ending 3rd world hungers.

Wow that's a mighty serious wish for a game . Uh, wish granted but now no single human being is able to reproduce. As a result, humanity is extinct after 120 years.

I wish I was stronger than even SuperMan.

 

[beringtom]

Wish granted! but you got in a bar fight with Chuck Norris and he roundkicked you to death!

I wish the french would invent a even longer bread!

 

[kevinthedude2000]

Granted, but they refuse to let you have any.

I wish for Jeb to stop releasing more versions of 1.4! (Hes announced that hes gonna make a 1.4.6)

 

[QueWhat]

Wish granted, Jeb stops releasing 1.4s and releases 1.5 with the same crap he was going to put in 1.4.6 and then immediately releases a 1.5.1.01 and then a 1.5.1.02 etc... Until 1.5.9.99. Each affecting IDs and world gen.

I wish I was the best builder in minecraft!

 

[Narcisism]

Wish granted, Jeb stops releasing 1.4s and releases 1.5 with the same crap he was going to put in 1.4.6 and then immediately releases a 1.5.1.01 and then a 1.5.1.02 etc... Until 1.5.9.99. Each affecting IDs and world gen.

I wish I was the best builder in minecraft!

Wish granted. Everyone else is now limited to 9x9 cobblestone huts, except you. You now have to wander around every server and see nothing but 9x9s EVERYWHERE. Even on the VoxelBox.

Derp: I forgot a wish.
I wish that I had about 600, legally obtained, not counterfeit United States Dollars with which to by a computer with which I can record and play video games at 60FPS.

 

[QueWhat]

Derp: I forgot a wish.
I wish that I had about 600, legally obtained, not counterfeit United States Dollars with which to by a computer with which I can record and play video games at 60FPS.

Wish granted, you earn 600, legally obtained, not counterfeit United States Dollars. But first, you must spend 300 hours working as a Calcutta sewer cleaner in order to make $600, but then when you finally buy the computer and start recording at 60FPS suddenly your cheap computer's cooling fans fail, BIOS fails and CPU overheats, causing it to catch on fire and burn your brand new PC and your house.

Edit: woops forgot my wish. I wish I had a six pack (abs, nor beer).

 

[comp500]

I wish that I was viral on youtube in two seconds. (Derp)

 

[Lucius]

Wish granted! You now have a set of 6 well defined muscles, unfortunately they are on your forehead and you will be chased contantly by star trek fans wondering if you are a klingon.
(and just because: Wish granted! The new 2 second long viral video of you showing a grotesque face -during an unspeakable act- is so well known you become a dictionary term. Pulling a 'comp500' is now known as losing the ability to look human briefly, through pain/pleasure/unknown.)

I wish quantum computing technology was 20 years more advanced than it currently is.