Destroy the Chest V.2/spin-off

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The chest steps out the box with a beautiful perm. You should talk to your careers advisor about opening a hair salon.

I run it over with this. Repeatedly.
20141021172750
 
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Celestialphoenix said:
The chest steps out the box with a beautiful perm. You should talk to your careers advisor about opening a hair salon.

I run it over with this. Repeatedly.
20141021172750
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I was hoping you'd say it got hit by a relativistic baseball out of the blue :D

The chest gets rolled around and scuffed up a little but takes no major damage.

I summon OUAT's Rumplestiltskin to use his darkest magics and open the chest.
 
Rumple's price is higher than you're willing to pay. You have a little more sense than most of the characters on OUAT.

I summon a relativistic baseball pitcher, a ball, and get out of the area before the ball is thrown.

Oh, and just in case: I put an infinite pit trap at first base, in case the chest survives and gets a walk.
 
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The chest's accelerated metabolism makes it impossible for it to get drunk. (Captain America reference)

I warp the chest into a Bob and George comic, then tell Mega Man, George, and Chadling that it contains an infinite amount of ice cream. (please read the Bob and George comics before replying)
 
gold49 said:
How many black holes get thrown at this chest?! I think this is atleast the third in this thread alone...anyway, the explosion does no damage, but the black hole is absorbed by the chest. The chest also uses the gravitational force of the black hole to absorb the whole earth, so if anyone need me I will be heading toward mars with enough supplies to 'rebuild' mars's atmosphere and lots of plants.

I send the chest into the Sun.
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Mars atmosphere is not strong enough to hold an atmosphere meaning that you would burn up due to the lack of an ozone layer
 
I place the chest between two suns as they collide with each other and then explode the gravitational pull will tear the chest apart then they will collide and cause a massive nuclear reaction with the chest in the center of it.
 
The chest has a higher gravitational pull than a million suns combined (don't ask me how it's not a black hole) and is nuclear-resistant

I seduce the chest with some booze.
 
The chest doesn't fall for alcohol a second time and politely declines.

I give the chest some LSD in hope that the trip lowers its guard for easier destruction.
 
The chest is too responsible to do drugs, and politely declines.

I do the same thing I did last time in the hopes that someone will actually counter it this time.
 
The lock stays solid, and once you turn off the blowtorch, it spits a flame identical to the one that came out of the blowtorch.

I call chest.open().
 
The chest installs a program to crash Java.
I create a localized field of temporal acceration, hoping to rust the chest's lid's hinge.
 
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