So, I was a couple pages behind, I admit to skipping the posts that seemed too hostile/flamey. But I would like to weigh in with my opinion about how respect works (or at least how it works for me). Since it does not exactly fall into either of the categories Velo listed.
I respect people departmentally, especially in regards to people I do not know. What this means is that if I am familiar with someone through their work, they get instant respect for that work. That means I treat both the work itself, and their efforts into its creation with respect. I do not however respect that person in general. How does this end up working out for how I treat their work and them? Well, let me illustrate with a movie series I quite enjoy before talking about it directly and in regards to mods.
I really like the Star Wars movie series, have since I was a kid and got the original series on VHS (I am a bit too young to have experienced it in the theaters). I respect George Lucas and the other people involved for making it. I do not however watch episode 1. If I wish to watch a marathon of Star Wars, I pretend episode 1 does not exist. Were I to introduce a friend to Star Wars (has happened before). I would have them watch the series out of order. (4,5,2,3,6 if you care) Lucas would likely object to this, instead wishing for it to be consumed in order. I disagree, and will consume (and redistribute) the product in the order I feel creates the best experience. I will also intentionally use my old versions of the films that do not contain many of the revisions added later (wtf, Greedo shoots first?!?!?), as i do not feel they add anything significant to the story, and in some cases even detract from it.
So, now with that example out of the way, lets talk directly.
First, as demonstrated I have zero regard for consuming and sharing the product in the way that the creator wishes. Respect for the product does not cause me to consume it in a way that I find less enjoyable, or to share it in a way that would be less enjoyable. It actually does the exact opposite, it causes me to carefully consider how I can obtain and spread the maximum level of enjoyment for the product, even if that method differs from the opinion of the creator.
Second, I have no problem simply removing portions of the content that I feel detract from the whole. Be that entire movies or simply small parts. This one is a bit harder to directly relate, but again it all has to do with obtaining the maximum enjoyment from the product. If part of the product does not work, it is my obligation to remove it.
Third, (and this part was not necessarily clear by the example). I am very careful to properly give credit for the product. This is where that respect for the effort comes in. They put their time and thought into making something which I enjoy. When I discuss it with others I refer to it by the proper name, and where appropriate credit the appropriate people. It is not "that movie with lightsabres" it is "Star Wars". It is not "The one with the snow" it is "The Empire Strikes Back". It is not "My flying mining ship in FTB" It is "My IC2 miner mounted on RP frames, fully automated with a combination of: ender chests, RP tubes and devices, and a few TE machines, controlled by CC". This is not the responsibility of mod pack creators though (with the exception of simply having a list of included mods, which everyone does already), this is the responsibility of the end user.
This is honestly something I think we have a problem with in our society, in more ways than one. Take the way we worship actors or sports stars for instance. We respect them for their talents, but then we go beyond that, and care about what they have to say about things entirely outside that. Simply because someone creates or possess a talent you respect, does not mean that they are worthy of your respect in general. Some of the greatest achievers in history were giant douchebags as people. Respect the accomplishment and the work, not the person in general.
EDIT to be clear: When I talk about spreading it in different ways, this does not extend to ways that actually deprive creators of profits. This is not an issue in MC modding, and in regards to the movie I thought it was pretty clear we were not talking about me actually burning dvds or anything.