I'm offended! I wasn't even considered for this position of Mayor? Jeez. Am I not trustworthy enough? Is that it? Do we have a trust issue going on here? Come on now. Am I any less competent than the other people you've nominated? Vikestep, the backstabber? 016Nojr, the backstabbed? How about Strikingwolf, the... Um... Well, he has wolf in his NAME! I'msorrydeadhorse. Would you elect Jim Murderedaguy for president of your country?
Unless... Wait, I get it. The mayor is likely to die first, so you're all trying to protect me by ignoring my campaign? Yes! Oh, I'm sorry I ever doubted you guys. I should've known you had my best interests at heart. Thank you! It's good to be cared for by so many people! It must have been a real collective effort to not vote for me.
In other news, apparently I got the "Slightly crazy politician with a big ego" role. Like Stephen Colbert? Yeah. Definitely.
I vote to Lynch Nobody. I elect Nobody for mayor.