The Truly Terrible Jokes/Puns Thread

Discussion in 'Forum Games' started by jordsta95, Apr 16, 2015.

  1. jordsta95

    jordsta95 New Member

    How many psychologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

    2. One to change the light bulb, and one to hold his peni- LADDER!
     
    Lethosos likes this.
  2. sgbros1

    sgbros1 New Member

    What if the bulb is on the ground...?
     
  3. lenscas

    lenscas Over-Achiever

    not sure if I posted this one already but anyway....
    • 1 to post a thread in a mailing list telling the bulb has burnt.
    • 1 to suggest to try to turn the lamp on through command lines.
    • 1 to complain that the user broke the thread.
    • 1 to ask what new bulb will he install.
    • 1 to advice that we shouldn't use the word burn for meaning a broken lightbulb, because it would mean that the bulb was set on fire and that it would be right to say that the bulb broke due to an excess of electrical current.
    • 25 to suggest to install all the kinds of existing and imaginable lightbulbs.
    • 5 who say that the burnt bulb is an upstream issue that doesn't belong to the distro. There's an open bug on the bulb's developer mail list.
    • 1 noob to suggest to install a Microsoft lightbulb.
    • 250 to flood the noob's mail address.
    • 300 to say that a Microsoft lightbulb would turn blue and that you'd had to reboot continuously to get back to normal.
    • 1 former GNU/Linux user who still frequents the forum, to suggest to install an Apple iBulb, which has a fresh and innovating design and it costs $250.
    • 20 to say that iBulbs aren't free, and that they have less functions than a 20 times cheaper standard lightbulb.
    • 15 to suggest to install a national lightbulb.
    • 30 to say that national lightbulbs are crippled remasters of foreign lightbulbs and that they don't bring anything new.
    • 23 to argue if it must be a white or a transparent bulb.
    • 1 to remind everyone that the right name is GNU/Lightbulb.
    • 1 to say that lightbulbs are a Winbugs users thing and that real GNU/Linux users aren't afraid of the dark.
    • 1 to announce finally which will be the model of the installed bulb.
    • 217 to discard the chosen model and suggest another.
    • 6 to complain that the chosen lightbulb has propietary elements, and that another should be used.
    • 20 to say that a 100% free bulb, isn't compatible with the lamp switch.
    • The same previous 6, to suggest to change the switch for a compatible one.
    • 1 to yell out: “STOP ARGUING AND CHANGE THAT LIGHTBULB FOR GOD'S SAKE!”
    • 350 to ask the previous user what God is he talking about, and that if he has scientific proofs of His existence.
    • 1 to explain how electricity works and why a light bulb is inefficient.
    • 1 to say that we can't trust in corporation-made bulbs and that we should trust in community-made bulbs.
    • 1 to post a link to an ODF file explaining how to build a lightbulb from scratch.
    • 14 to complain about the format of the previous file and asking to send it in txt or LaTeX.
    • 5 to say that they didn't like the taken decission and that they'll fork the house's electric installation and install a better lamp.
    • 1 to post a series of commands to put to change the lightbulb.
    • 1 to comment that he executed the commands and had an error message.
    • 1 to advice that the commands must be executed as root.
    And finally:

    The father of the first user, who while everyone was discussing, went to the shop and bought the cheapest lightbulb
     
  4. LivingAngryCheese

    LivingAngryCheese Over-Achiever

    YOU'D BETTER NOT FUCK ME!
     
  5. jordsta95

    jordsta95 New Member

    You know you'd enjoy it ;)
     
  6. LivingAngryCheese

    LivingAngryCheese Over-Achiever

    0_o

     
    Lethosos likes this.
  7. RJS

    RJS New Member

  8. LivingAngryCheese

    LivingAngryCheese Over-Achiever

    Plz no.
     
  9. RJS

    RJS New Member

     
  10. jordsta95

    jordsta95 New Member

    That room is reserved for myself ad @goreae LAC has to ask to join ;)
     
  11. sgbros1

    sgbros1 New Member

    I would like to welcome honourary members Jordan and Cheese...
     
    LivingAngryCheese likes this.
  12. Lethosos

    Lethosos New Member

    *is just rotflol'ing at you guys now*

    Sent from my Puzzle Box of Yogg-Saron using Tapatalk 2
     
    jordsta95 likes this.
  13. eeffoc

    eeffoc New Member

    Necromancy is a living thing.
     
    Celestialphoenix and jordsta95 like this.
  14. Type1Ninja

    Type1Ninja New Member

    Did... Did you wait until that joke would be a necropost to make it? :p
     
    eeffoc likes this.
  15. Dylz101

    Dylz101 New Member

    A plane crashes and every single person except 2 people survive.
    Why did they survive it?
     
  16. sgbros1

    sgbros1 New Member

    They were married. Touche.
     
  17. Dylz101

    Dylz101 New Member

    Hehe
     
  18. jordsta95

    jordsta95 New Member

    They didn't >_>
     
  19. Celestialphoenix

    Celestialphoenix Too Much Free Time

    The two pilots died.
    Every single person [the rest of humanity] wasn't in the plane.
    -------------------
    Also my local radio station is doing 'garden' related puns....

    The Clash- I Fought the Lawn
    AC/DC- Rockery and Roll ain't Noise Pollution.
    Ace of spades- Mowerhead
    Franz Ferdinand- This Bonfire
    Deep Purple- Smoke on the Waterbutt
     
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2015
    Type1Ninja likes this.
  20. jordsta95

    jordsta95 New Member

    There's an Islamic butcher's shop somewhere in Britain called "Halal, is meat your looking for?"
     

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