I just started using Opis, and wow, what a difference. I couldn't understand why on my beast of a machine, I wasn't reaching a consistent 60 FPS. A couple of audits and Hopper removals later, and my framerate is as smooth as the average infant's rear end.
According to my testing so far, when it comes to lag, vanilla Hoppers are Public Enemy No. 1. It's sad, because I know how much we all love them, in terms of their utility. I'm actually thinking of re-enabling the recipe for BC's Hoppers, just to see if they are more efficient.
Other culprits; Capacitor Banks and Conduit Bundles from Ender IO. I really don't want to get on CrazyPants' case, here; it's a beautiful mod, which adds some awesome things to the game, but unfortunately it adds a side helping of lag along with it. I imagine that CP would possibly respond by saying that if you want to cross a proverbial bridge, you have to pay a toll in terms of ram/CPU cycles. My compromise is to charge up Ender IO's capacitors, and then put them into storage when they are not needed for actual use. For cabling, Mekanism's, or BC's seem good.
OpenBlocks tanks cause spikes, as well; which was a little surprising initially, but makes sense on reflection. Fluid dynamics of any kind are notoriously bad in Minecraft; I've seen laptops scream for mercy when there was even a small amount of water flowing around. DartCraft's Force Infuser seems to issue a few pings when idle, as well; as does MFR's Mob Grinder.
I haven't got into either ThaumCraft or AM yet, but I'm expecting magic mods to be lagalicious in general, due to all those flashy particle effects.