I'd say stick with the basic rules, such as no griefing, hacking, and respect fellow players and staff. Keep banned items to a minimum. If there is one thing that can turn off players from a server, it's a long banlist of items. I suggest using plugins such as MyTown and world guard for protection(MyTown is especially good since it is a forge mod, so can prevent griefs from mod items). Also, try not to make people pay for the privilege to use certain items. Speaking as a player of many modded servers, this is incredibly annoying.
okay so far i already know i need to ban Nukes, and World anchor
i will Allow TnT, Placement of Lava and etc but the player has to have a permission on the ground he is on
i find alot of servers that disallow tnt,lava and so but there must be a mod that protect the ground u claimed right?
Ps:
sorry my spelling i suck at it