Eh, sorry, Cheese, you're in a bit of a sticky spot so I'll have you to ask to rewind it to when you wake up in the hospital due to a plethora of continuity errors.
Well, for starters:
- With the whole giant rabbit ramming into you, I think you shouldn't be able to walk it off like it's nothing.
- On top of that, as far as I know, they don't allow weapons into hospitals, that includes the bow and arrow.
- Even worse, you're presuming people aren't noticing you.
- At the end of the second paragraph, you acknowledge that your weapons shouldn't be there with you. So why, exactly, would they allow the bow and arrow into the hospital?
- Simon's apartment isn't anywhere near the Hospital.
- To top it off, the emotional transition due to feedback is overly jarring. Sudden mood change, and it feelsl like a cheap excuse for a plot.
So, basically, edit it, you know, make it genuinely feel like it could be real, try to not have any sort of plot hole, and I'll delete my post, alright?