Hey. I am the LivingAngryCheese.

LivingAngryCheese

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Aug 22, 2014
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Two days ago was a special day. It was my anniversary on the forums. I thought I would follow in the footsteps of others on this forum and tell of my troubles in life. Now these are not as severe as someone's like pc_assassin, and I'm not here to complain or get sympathy, I'm here to share and explain.

I have lived a happy upper middle class life, with few problems. However there has been one glaring problem I've faced. A medical issue; an autoimmune disease known as coeliac disease. Coeliac disease isn't seen as that serious because only one in ten people get symptoms, the rest only get increased chances of getting horrible diseases. Around a quarter of the people who get symptoms get severe symptoms. I am one of these people. I found this out six months ago, when one of many doctors decided it might be a good idea to give me a blood test to see if I was one of the one in a hundred people who had coeliac disease. A few blood tests and an operation later, I couldn't eat gluten anymore. Here is a list of effects, how often I get/got them and their secondary effects:
Severe constipation: Literally constant until roughly 3 months after not eating gluten - Extreme pain, lack of sleep from having to get up earlier for school, gain in weight which in turn led to bullying.
Severe diarrhoea: Very often from roughly the age of 12 until roughly 2 months after stopping eating gluten - Pain, lack of sleep from having to get up earlier for school.
Wetting and crapping myself: Often but lessened off over the years which is the opposite of everything else - Humiliation, Bullying, very mild pain, lack of sleep, forced secretivity.
Headaches, Stomach aches and random pains: Very often, even now - Pain, mocking (drama queen).
Joint tissue inflammation: Once - Ridiculous pain (worse than breaking your arm)
Increase in sadness: Literally constant until roughly one month after not eating gluten - Depression.
Abnormal increase in heat during the night: Constant until roughly two months after not eating gluten - Lack of sleep.
Prone to illness: Literally constant until a while after not eating gluten - almost caused me to have my tonsils removed from getting tonsillitis so much.

So as you can see, I was sad, couldn't sleep, was bullied, was often in pain, spent a lot of my life on the toilet, was thought to be melodramatic and was forced to be secretive. There's one thing in this list though that isn't entirely true. Bullying. I was actually quite a respected guy, a lot of people liked me, and I didn't get made fun of any more than the average person, when I say bullying, I'm talking about a specific time. Once, I went to a kind of thing where we'd go to school in the holidays, but instead of doing work, we did fun activities like trampolining and animating. From what I understand about America, I think it's kind of like a summer camp over there. Anyway, there was this boy called Oliver Morgan there who was four years older than me, and thought it would be a good idea to get him and his friend to massively bully me. I'm just now leaving the year he was in and I still can't understand how he could do that to a little kid. By seriously bullied, I mean physically beating me up really badly, verbally insulting me, whatever they could do, and so I resorted to doing the last thing I want to do. Ever. Telling off someone. Even now, I don't like to tell off of people, but I know that doing that was the right thing. However, it took them five days to do anything about it. Another group of boys, three the same age as me (I could stand up for myself but not against three people or older people) bullied me on this course, but one time, when they pushed me down stairs and two of them laughed, the sort of "coolest one" in their group seemed to look on in horror, as if he'd realised what he had been doing all along. I was never bullied by them again. "The leader of their pack" I can now forgive, one of the others I can stand because his parents aren't exactly the nicest, and one I will forever hate. Since being bullied I've had problems controlling my anger, 'I see the red mist' so to speak. I once smashed in somebody's nose because he accidentally hit me when he was fooling around. However, I've always had good morals, I've never been a hypocrite knowingly and my good morals are probably a result of that. Well, I believe them to be good morals from what I know. I'm left wing, support the poor, anti-racist, anti-sexist etc. Now you may think I'm being hypocritical here, because I find some racist and sexist jokes funny. I would not find them funny if people actually said them as an insult. As long as no one is offended, no harm done. What I'm trying to explain is my strange jumpy behaviour, when I protect somebody or attack somebody for good moral reasons, then fiercely protect those views in an almost unreasonable way. And why I argue so much and am often rude. When I discovered I had coeliac, the effects were getting really bad, and I became quite depressed, and the stresses of having to be really careful about what I eat and the changes in my diet seemed like a lot more of a problem than they should have done. All the complexities of social life with who was cool, and trying to keep old friends etc. really tired me, and I became almost like a ghost around the world, kind of not talking or interacting much, only doing what I had to do, drifting from one thing to the next, remaining unfocused on any one project. I would sometimes sit and gaze into space, rather than have to deal with the tiring work of social life. That's what I need to thank you all for. Around that time, I spent a lot of time on my phone, on these forums. That was because here, everyone is equal. If you wanted to you could argue and be demolished by a Reiket scientist and nobody would bat an eyelid. It didn't matter who was cool, how old you are or who was clever, all our opinions were and are equally important. Luckily for me, during these dark times, I somehow found out that the person I liked actually liked me, and without her and these forums, I don't know how I would have got through these dark times. So thanks, all of you. And I I'd like to apologise to @dylanpiera . I hope this clears up our arguments. And as much as I get angry when I'm not right, I'd like to say that I was wrong. Please, forget all the times I was rude or argued with you, I know I picked the fights as you may say. I've just been too troubled by my own past to admit you were right. I hope you can put the past behind you and forgive me, and if you can't, I understand. Despite my decisions being influenced by outside problems, it was always me inside that called the shots. So, finally. Sorry. Now all of you, goodbye, I have to calm myself down, I've never told anyone all these troubles before, not even my parents, and I don't intend to make them feel guilty. But anyway, I guess this isn't a time to be sad, it's a time to celebrate! It's my late-anniversary! It's late because everything I do is late! Yeah! Late partys!
 

pc_assassin

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Jul 29, 2019
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Well.... I guess we can be misfits together then :p Thanks for telling us this I could never tell anyone something like this, I am perfectly fine talking about what other people did or do but when it comes to talking about myself directly I tend to choke. If your anything like me it took a heck of a lot to get this out.
 
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LivingAngryCheese

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Aug 22, 2014
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Well.... I guess we can be misfits together then Thanks for telling us this I could never tell anyone something like this, I am perfectly fine talking about what other people did or do but when it comes to talking about myself directly I tend to choke. If your anything like me it took a heck of a lot to get this out.
Yes it did :) Thanks dude. I could never read this out loud, and even writing it was difficult.

Edit: Also, that's bs
You talked about yourself plenty of times in your story.

Edit2: The hardest bit for me was actually apologising to @dylanpiera because that directly goes against my initial reactions even though I know it was the right thing to do.
 

ljfa

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Jul 29, 2019
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Gosh that was a wall of text

well, that's bad news. Hope you're able to cope woth your disease
And it's true that these kinds of things don't get conveyed over the internet, so people here don't know about them
 
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lenscas

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Jul 31, 2013
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I got nothing. How on EARTH did I manage to misread "Coeliac Disease" as "Lactose Intolerance".

.-.
I have seen worse, like thinking I said the dutch word for banana when I said the dutch word for electric bike

HOW ON EARTH DO YOU MAKE "BANAAN" FROM "ELEKTRISCHE FIETS" ?!?

oh, and @LivingAngryCheese see the fact that I don't react to your post not as an insult, I just can't really react to things like that for personal reasons.
 
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LivingAngryCheese

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Aug 22, 2014
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I have seen worse, like thinking I said the dutch word for banana when I said the dutch word for electric bike

HOW ON EARTH DO YOU MAKE "BANAAN" FROM "ELEKTRISCHE FIETS" ?!?

oh, and @LivingAngryCheese see the fact that I don't react to your post not as an insult, I just can't really react to things like that for personal reasons.
I don't understand what you mean, but I don't want to pry, so I'll just respect that decision.
 

lenscas

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Jul 31, 2013
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I don't understand what you mean, but I don't want to pry, so I'll just respect that decision.
I have a hard time getting the right words when someone tells bad stuff about his/her life, if I would to say anything about it I would have to really force myself. If I do that then the result is worse then when I just had stayed silent or it becomes a generic sentence that doesn't mean anything or both.
However normally you can't really stay silent when a friend tells stuff like that, on a forum however it seems you can do it. Thank you for respecting my decision.