Something that amused me today

malicious_bloke

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Jul 28, 2013
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I was at work, minding my own business as usual, when it becomes apparent one of my co-workers is having computer trouble.

He stomps off down to tech support to summon one of the denizens that dwell therein, and in short order returns with one of the IT guys in tow.

It is then I overheard the following conversation:
"Whenever I close an excel file then come back to it, it turns into this weird corrupted ghost file with crazy symbols everywhere"

"OK, can you save this current file and close it for me please?"
"Now re-open it"


"See? It's all corrupted?"

"....That's because you're trying to open it in wordpad...."

<transmission lost in stifled giggles>

How the hell does one not notice that your file isn't opening in the same program? How the hell does a deskmonkey know so little about *the basics of every windows operating system since the early 90s*

It just made me chuckle, I could never be an IT tech, the dealings with mongoloids would drive me to murder within a week.
 

Yusunoha

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Jul 29, 2019
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I was at work, minding my own business as usual, when it becomes apparent one of my co-workers is having computer trouble.

He stomps off down to tech support to summon one of the denizens that dwell therein, and in short order returns with one of the IT guys in tow.

It is then I overheard the following conversation:
"Whenever I close an excel file then come back to it, it turns into this weird corrupted ghost file with crazy symbols everywhere"

"OK, can you save this current file and close it for me please?"
"Now re-open it"


"See? It's all corrupted?"

"....That's because you're trying to open it in wordpad...."

<transmission lost in stifled giggles>

How the hell does one not notice that your file isn't opening in the same program? How the hell does a deskmonkey know so little about *the basics of every windows operating system since the early 90s*

It just made me chuckle, I could never be an IT tech, the dealings with mongoloids would drive me to murder within a week.

my standard reply to these stupid questions would be "did you try turning it off and on again?" or "deleting system32 should do it"
 

ThorinNL

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Jul 29, 2019
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Hahaha, that's a good anecdote. Now keep pestering your colleague with it for a long .... long time.

Trust me, we got similar id10ts here too.
and sadly I'm one of those denizens that has come over and fix it.

I had to adapt my attitude when I got this job (or lose it, if I didn't).
Whilst I didn't murder them, my sarcastic replies where not really tolerated even if they contained the solution for their problem.
 

fleutius

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Jul 29, 2019
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Hahaha, that's a good anecdote. Now keep pestering your colleague with it for a long .... long time.

Trust me, we got similar id10ts here too.
and sadly I'm one of those denizens that has come over and fix it.

I had to adapt my attitude when I got this job (or lose it, if I didn't).
Whilst I didn't murder them, my sarcastic replies where not really tolerated even if they contained the solution for their problem.
And that was exactly that kind of replies that got me fired from IT ;) "lady, for the 50th time. Do not drink coffee at the computer when you can't control the mug"
 

ThorinNL

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Jul 29, 2019
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a word that I use freely between my IT-colleges
pebkac : problem exist between keyboard and chair
 

McJty

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A funny thing that happened a long time ago here at the place that I work (a hospital) is when we gave a nurse her first computer to use for patient administration. She held up the mouse and started pointing it at the screen in order to move the pointer. Worked much better once she actually placed the mouse on the table :)

Of course that was some time ago. These days almost all people know the basics of what you should do with a computer mouse.
 

Yusunoha

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Jul 29, 2019
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A funny thing that happened a long time ago here at the place that I work (a hospital) is when we gave a nurse her first computer to use for patient administration. She held up the mouse and started pointing it at the screen in order to move the pointer. Worked much better once she actually placed the mouse on the table :)

Of course that was some time ago. These days almost all people know the basics of what you should do with a computer mouse.

don't put your money on that bet... seriously
for example my mother, she's terrible with electronics

she can't even use a digital kitchen timer with only 2 buttons on it
 

ThorinNL

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Jul 29, 2019
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Same case as "the cup holder on my PC broke. I need a new one"

Was waiting for this one ;)

Had someone on the phone a few years ago, who said she couldn't turn her pc on and demanded that we must come over and fix it (we already knew what had happened).
We asked if she had the lights on in her office, she replied that those didn't work either. Second question was "if there was any light on, in her building". She confirmed that none of the lights worked in her building but the building opposite of mine has lights on.

We told her that there was a power outage going on and only critical systems and buildings were being powered by generators.
 

dalekslayer96

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Jul 29, 2019
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Was waiting for this one ;)

Had someone on the phone a few years ago, who said she couldn't turn her pc on and demanded that we must come over and fix it (we already knew what had happened).
We asked if she had the lights on in her office, she replied that those didn't work either. Second question was "if there was any light on, in her building". She confirmed that none of the lights worked in her building but the building opposite of mine has lights on.

We told her that there was a power outage going on and only critical systems and buildings were being powered by generators.
Oh god...


Sent from my iPhone 96Z using some top secret Dalekslayer Inc. technology.
 

ThatOneSlowking

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Jul 29, 2019
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Was waiting for this one ;)

Had someone on the phone a few years ago, who said she couldn't turn her pc on and demanded that we must come over and fix it (we already knew what had happened).
We asked if she had the lights on in her office, she replied that those didn't work either. Second question was "if there was any light on, in her building". She confirmed that none of the lights worked in her building but the building opposite of mine has lights on.

We told her that there was a power outage going on and only critical systems and buildings were being powered by generators.
I...
How...
HOW IN THE NINE HELLS CAN SOMEONE BE THAT STUPID?
 
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Qazplm601

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Sep 21, 2013
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Where else?
I...
How...
HOW IN THE NINE HELLS CAN SOMEONE BE THAT STUPID?
you have not met the people i know. *shudder* (flashback time!)

Id10t:hey, my computer isn't working, can you help?
me: sure, whats wrong?
id10t:it won't turn on.
me:*looks at it, seeing if any lights are on and trying to turn it on*
me:when did it start not working?
id10t:about a week ago.
me:did you do anything out of the ordinary?
id10t:no.
me:anything happen to any part of the computer?
id10t:my dog chewed on the wall cord thing, but i taped it back up with some duct tape the computer turned on fine, the screen was dimmer tho, a bit after that it broke.
me:....
me: you will need to replace it, it is what "broke" your computer.
id10t:no way! i don't have money to spare. i will just use my mom's cord.
me:isn't your moms computer a mac?
id10t:yes, why?
me:this is a ACER.
id10t:it doesn't matter, those cords are universal.
me:....... *walks away*
 

ThatOneSlowking

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you have not met the people i know. *shudder* (flashback time!)

Id10t:hey, my computer isn't working, can you help?
me: sure, whats wrong?
id10t:it won't turn on.
me:*looks at it, seeing if any lights are on and trying to turn it on*
me:when did it start not working?
id10t:about a week ago.
me:did you do anything out of the ordinary?
id10t:no.
me:anything happen to any part of the computer?
id10t:my dog chewed on the wall cord thing, but i taped it back up with some duct tape the computer turned on fine, the screen was dimmer tho, a bit after that it broke.
me:....
me: you will need to replace it, it is what "broke" your computer.
id10t:no way! i don't have money to spare. i will just use my mom's cord.
me:isn't your moms computer a mac?
id10t:yes, why?
me:this is a ACER.
id10t:it doesn't matter, those cords are universal.
me:....... *walks away*
I do not understand how a human adult can function with so little intelligence.
 
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dalekslayer96

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you have not met the people i know. *shudder* (flashback time!)

Id10t:hey, my computer isn't working, can you help?
me: sure, whats wrong?
id10t:it won't turn on.
me:*looks at it, seeing if any lights are on and trying to turn it on*
me:when did it start not working?
id10t:about a week ago.
me:did you do anything out of the ordinary?
id10t:no.
me:anything happen to any part of the computer?
id10t:my dog chewed on the wall cord thing, but i taped it back up with some duct tape the computer turned on fine, the screen was dimmer tho, a bit after that it broke.
me:....
me: you will need to replace it, it is what "broke" your computer.
id10t:no way! i don't have money to spare. i will just use my mom's cord.
me:isn't your moms computer a mac?
id10t:yes, why?
me:this is a ACER.
id10t:it doesn't matter, those cords are universal.
me:....... *walks away*
OH MY... THE STUPIDITY!!!
Another example:
So, I'm chatting with a bunch of guys the other day, and one of them wants to pirate Microsoft Office.
Id10t: I wanna pirate Microsoft Office, how do I do that?
Guy 1 (Not an Id10t): You do that by download a .dmg file on the internet.
Id10t: So where do I find this DMG file? Can you send it to me?
Guy 1: No, the file isn't called DMG, the file type is .dmg
Id10t: So how do I download it?
Guy 1: You search it on Google! How else?!
Id10t: Yeah, so what do I search? DMG file?
Guy 1: NO, the file TYPE is dmg, not the name!
Id10t: Yeah. So I search up DMG file?
Guy 1: NO, the file TYPE is dmg, not the name!
Id10t: Yeah. So I search up DMG file?
Guy 1: NO, the file TYPE is dmg, not the name!
Id10t: Yeah. So I search up DMG file?
Guy 1: NO, the file TYPE is dmg, not the name!
Id10t: Yeah. So I search up DMG file?
Guy 1: NO, the file TYPE is dmg, not the name!
Id10t: Yeah. So I search up DMG file?
Me: *facepalm*
 

ThatOneSlowking

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Jul 29, 2019
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OH MY... THE STUPIDITY!!!
Another example:
So, I'm chatting with a bunch of guys the other day, and one of them wants to pirate Microsoft Office.
Id10t: I wanna pirate Microsoft Office, how do I do that?
Guy 1 (Not an Id10t): You do that by download a .dmg file on the internet.
Id10t: So where do I find this DMG file? Can you send it to me?
Guy 1: No, the file isn't called DMG, the file type is .dmg
Id10t: So how do I download it?
Guy 1: You search it on Google! How else?!
Id10t: Yeah, so what do I search? DMG file?
Guy 1: NO, the file TYPE is dmg, not the name!
Id10t: Yeah. So I search up DMG file?
Guy 1: NO, the file TYPE is dmg, not the name!
Id10t: Yeah. So I search up DMG file?
Guy 1: NO, the file TYPE is dmg, not the name!
Id10t: Yeah. So I search up DMG file?
Guy 1: NO, the file TYPE is dmg, not the name!
Id10t: Yeah. So I search up DMG file?
Guy 1: NO, the file TYPE is dmg, not the name!
Id10t: Yeah. So I search up DMG file?
Me: *facepalm*
If they both kept repeating it sounds like they were joking.